Surviving the holiday season before and after divorce

The holidays mean basking in twinkling lights, opening gifts and attending parties. However, for some couples in Worcester County, the holiday season can be the time that they decide to call it quits. According to a professor from the University of Washington, spending the holidays together may make couples realize that they are no longer happy and it's time to end their marriage.

Managing emotions during the holidays

Deciding to get divorced during the holiday season can be difficult, particularly if there are children involved in the marriage. If you and your spouse are considering divorce:

  • Don't allow feelings of guilt to pervade the time you spend with your children and family members during the holiday season.
  • Make sure that your decision to get divorced is grounded in rational feelings.
  • Think about how announcing your divorce around the holidays will impact your feelings towards the holiday season in later years.
  • If anyone reacts negatively to your decision, don't react and wait for their initial feelings to calm down.

Although divorce is never easy at any time of the year, following these tips may minimize the difficulties that ensue when the decision is made to pursue divorce over the holiday season.

Planning the holidays with children

After a divorce is finalized, things may change during the holiday season for both a divorced couple and their children. If an individual and their ex-spouse are able to get along, they may want to consider hosting one holiday event for themselves, their children, and their ex-spouse to attend. However, if this is not an option due to contentions feelings, it may be best to keep holiday events separate between both parents.

Before the holiday season, make sure that all specifics and plans about which parent gets which day during the holidays are discussed. Put this agreement in writing if a routine has not already been developed for the holiday season to avoid disagreements and one parent not staying true to their word.

In addition to this, one parent should not try to compete with the other parent when it comes to gift giving. Parents should talk with their ex-spouse before shopping begins to come up with a general budget, address how many gifts will be given to each child, and to prevent the children receiving from duplicate presents.

If you and your spouse have made the decision to begin divorce proceedings over the holiday season, contact an experienced attorney in your area. Working with an attorney can minimize the impact your divorce has on your ability to enjoy the holiday season.